Joke Time

A 110year old man is having his annual checkup. The doctor asks how he is feeling.
'I have never felt better.' the oldboy replies. 'But I have something exciting I just have to tell you doc. I have an 18 year old bride who is pregnant with my child.'
The dodtor is in shock and thinks for a moment.
He then says 'Let me tell you a story. I know a guy who is an avid hunter and he never misses. One day he is in a hurry and he grabs his unbrella by mistake instead of his gun.He is walking through the bush near a creek when he spots a beaver in the brush.He raises the unbrella, points it and squeezes the handle. Bam, the beaver drops dead in front of him.'
The old man says 'That is impossible. Someone else must have shot that beaver.'
'Exactly' says the doctor.

Two cows were standing in a field.
Becca says to Samantha 'I was artificially inseminated this morning.'
'I don't believe you.' says Samantha.
'It's true. No bull.'

dOES aNyONE KnOW hoW tO usE ThE caPSLoCK KEy?

Easy and el Donkey started to build a shed together. easy kept picking up nails out of the bucket, some he would use, but others he would just stick in his pocket.

Why, DonKey asked, are you doing that?"
Easy say, "cause I am going to use them on the other side of the shed?"

Why not go ahead and use them now???

Easy say, "cause the heads are on the wrong end of the nail, stupid"

DonKey and Easy are on the roof of a building in a town in a middle of the night with a flash light. Easy points the light beam to the roof of another building and says: "Could you now walk on the light beam to the other building?"
"Of course I could"
Easy says "well, go ahead"

Donkey say "NO"...

Easy say "well, why not?"

DonKey say
"because I am not stupid, you mean old goat, you are going to turn the light off when I am in the middle!"

Quote:

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Originally Posted by markabilly

Easy and el Donkey started to build a shed together. easy kept picking up nails out of the bucket, some he would use, but others he would just stick in his pocket.

Why, DonKey asked, are you doing that?"
Easy say, "cause I am going to use them on the other side of the shed?"

Why not go ahead and use them now???

Easy say, "cause the heads are on the wrong end of the nail, stupid"

---

donKey says "opps", and starts pulling out nails from the shed....

Markabilly and Taz were trying their hand at farming.
They met one morning at the local cafe.
'Had some problems with my herd.' says Markabilly. 'My prize bull was impotent. But the vet, Donkey, came along and gave him some special medicine and now he seems to be doing fine.'
The next week the two meet again and this time it was Taz with the impotent bull.
'My bull is having trouble too.' said Taz. "What was the name of that impotent medicine that Donkey prescribed?'
Markabilly thought for a minute and then said 'Hmm, I am not quite sure but it tastes just like chocalate.'

Markabilly used to have a great job as a lifeguard at a nude beach.
Then some blue guy got him fired.

Not my fault, he needed mouth to mouth, and i could not find easy anywhere

How do you catch a Bra?
Well first you have to set a boobie trap.



Two TV antennas met and fell in love and got married.
The wedding was nothing special but the reception was excellent.