Same Sex Marriage

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17th December 2012, 10:37
SGWilko

It is worth pointing out that, with children, only one needs to start the name calling, and others will join in. And they join in not because they are particularly mean, but because for them, better to be on the side of the class bully than risk being beaten up.

When I was bullied, while I kept it to myself and told no-one about it, I'd decided I had no wish to be 'on the side' of the bullies, and sadly, I was fair game.
17th December 2012, 10:47
Knock-on

I appreciate what you are saying about Children facing less potential issues if they grow up in a conventional Male / Female family unit. However, this is not a show stopper but merely one small issue in a bigger picture.

We have Children being brought up by parents that have seperated or single parents. They might be brought up where one of the parents have passed away. They might be in a care home themselves or living with foster parents. They might be of a different ethnic origon or religion from most of the other kids. Have different colour hair, a disability, learning problems, odd socks or pick their nose.

In fact, all Children are different which makes them the same. Bullying is slowly being stamped out and will continue to be as focus is applied to this problem.

A man and a woman have Children in a loving married relationship is an ideal that can offer a stable platform for successfully raising a child / children. That's not to say the Child will grow up as a well rounded person with no issues but I agree it's a good start. Equally, if a loan parent or a same sex couple offer the same stable environment, then the Child has a similar chance in life. They might have additional challenges but any parent faces challenges. It's a compromise and balancing act each and every day :D

There are more Children out there that need a stable home than suitable people that are prepared to offer them. That's the real issue.
17th December 2012, 11:07
SGWilko

Quote:

Originally Posted by Knock-on

I appreciate what you are saying about Children facing less potential issues if they grow up in a conventional Male / Female family unit. However, this is not a show stopper but merely one small issue in a bigger picture.

We have Children being brought up by parents that have seperated or single parents. They might be brought up where one of the parents have passed away. They might be in a care home themselves or living with foster parents. They might be of a different ethnic origon or religion from most of the other kids. Have different colour hair, a disability, learning problems, odd socks or pick their nose.

In fact, all Children are different which makes them the same. Bullying is slowly being stamped out and will continue to be as focus is applied to this problem.

A man and a woman have Children in a loving married relationship is an ideal that can offer a stable platform for successfully raising a child / children. That's not to say the Child will grow up as a well rounded person with no issues but I agree it's a good start. Equally, if a loan parent or a same sex couple offer the same stable environment, then the Child has a similar chance in life. They might have additional challenges but any parent faces challenges. It's a compromise and balancing act each and every day :D

There are more Children out there that need a stable home than suitable people that are prepared to offer them. That's the real issue.

Not every obese child is picked on, nor every child wearing glasses. But if a child is going to be a target, there are underlying issues that those that bully will pick up on.

I am not casting aspersions on the adoptive parents, but alluding to one of the myriad complications that they face.
17th December 2012, 11:37
Bezza

Quote:

Originally Posted by BDunnell

This is one of the worst arguments of all. It's like saying that someone who's the subject of a racist attack is to blame because of their skin colour.

Oh, and many of those who would deploy this argument against gay adoption are also the sort of individuals who go on about the need for personal responsibility...

Its not the same as racism at all. This is about same-sex versus opposite-sex couples - as in the natural way vs adoption into a gay partnership. Colour of skin is different, completely.

We are not on the side of the bully here. Just arguing that it is important the child has the best chance of success.
17th December 2012, 11:42
SGWilko

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bezza

Its not the same as racism at all. This is about same-sex versus opposite-sex couples - as in the natural way vs adoption into a gay partnership. Colour of skin is different, completely.

We are not on the side of the bully here. Just arguing that it is important the child has the best chance of success.

To avoid an outburst - can I clarify the natural way - you are alluding to childbirth with that I assume?
17th December 2012, 12:24
Bezza

Quote:

Originally Posted by SGWilko

To avoid an outburst - can I clarify the natural way - you are alluding to childbirth with that I assume?

Yes :)
17th December 2012, 15:14
Knock-on

Quote:

Originally Posted by SGWilko

Not every obese child is picked on, nor every child wearing glasses. But if a child is going to be a target, there are underlying issues that those that bully will pick up on.

I am not casting aspersions on the adoptive parents, but alluding to one of the myriad complications that they face.

And not every child that lives in an adopted family with same sex parents either?

I find it unacceptable that we should deny a Child a normal happy family life just because of a fear that a Bully could intimidate them. That strikes me as punishing the victim.

Perhaps the reason that this potential bullying might take place is because there has been such discrimination and ignorance of gay and lesbian couples generally. Perhaps the Church refusing to treat people different because of their sexuality would be a huge step in breaking down these unfair barriers. Perhaps one day we might be surprised that this was such a big deal.

Perhaps... we can hope.
17th December 2012, 15:26
SGWilko

Quote:

Originally Posted by Knock-on

I find it unacceptable that we should deny a Child a normal happy family life just because of a fear that a Bully could intimidate them. That strikes me as punishing the victim..

I quite agree. But the fact that a child finds him/herself in a position to be adopted suggests that already, this notion of a happy family has been taken away.

However, I take issue that you suggest anyone is denying a same sex couple be allowed to adopt. I just don't agree with it (as I don't agree with a church marriage as also discussed previously) because of the fundamental issues and hurdles that are thrown in the way, on top of the upheaval of being (in the position of) adopted in the first place.
17th December 2012, 19:04
donKey jote

Quote:

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17th December 2012, 20:03
SGWilko

Quote:

Originally Posted by donKey jote

:rolleyes:

AI is clearly a way off yet.....

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