The Last Word

[schmenke]

The LW is no laughing matter.

[djarumdudley]

i'm laughing at you for being without the last word

[Captain VXR]

.....hypocrite much?

[schmenke]

The LW does not understand poor grammar.

[Captain VXR]

i Fink yool find it.does,

[555-04Q2]

The WL tis is grummur...

[SGWilko]

The last word should always end with a . or ! or ?

[Captain VXR]

Last word dont need no punctuation

[SGWilko]

Nor thought control.

Hey, Captain, leave them [last] words alone......

[schmenke]

The LW is not amused.

[djarumdudley]

nor is it yours

[555-04Q2]

nor yours

[schmenke]

The LW belongs to noone. It is a free spirit that enjoys independence... and from time to time my company :D .

[djarumdudley]

and that time is over!

[Captain VXR]

I concur.

[djarumdudley]

i dissent

[555-04Q2]

The LW mocks you all...

[djarumdudley]

not so much

[Captain VXR]

futility is bestowed on you all.

[Rollo]

... full of sound and fury, signifying nothing?

[Captain VXR]

the lw is full of significance.

[djarumdudley]

nothing more significant than this post

[Captain VXR]

because your post demonstrates the significance of failure

[555-04Q2]

Dear Captain.....you make failure look like success! The LW is worried...

[schmenke]

The LW is safe with me. No need to worry.

[djarumdudley]

your loss of the last word should worry you

[Captain VXR]

and you.

[schmenke]

I feel more worried that the LW is with someone other than me, especially if it's with one of you lot.

[Rollo]

I wanna be the very best, like no-one ever was...

[djarumdudley]

the last word wants to be with none like you

[Captain VXR]

lw wants burger

[schmenke]

schmenke wants burger :(

[djarumdudley]

i'll have the last word, hold the burger

[schmenke]

I'd rather have the burger :mark:

[djarumdudley]

hope you had it, as you still don't have the last word

[555-04Q2]

Ya'll get nothing including the LW

[djarumdudley]

until now

[555-04Q2]

No, later, if you are lucky!

[Captain VXR]

I'm feeling lucky, and I passed Go and collected £200

[djarumdudley]

continue to jail, lose the last word to me

[Captain VXR]

Chance! You win a get out of jail free card and the last word.

[djarumdudley]

thank you very much

[555-04Q2]

you landed on my street with 3 hotels...I'll take the LW as payment seeing as you have no money left.

[schmenke]

You just landed on Boardwalk with 3 hotels. You can pay me in monthly installments if you want.

[Captain VXR]

Thanks to an anonymous tip off the police suspected you have a crack cocaine distribution centre in your hotels, so have siezed all of your assets, including the last word, given them to me, and now 555-04Q2 has to pay me in monthly installments.

[schmenke]

Tsk, no such activity has ever taken place in a fine establishment as mine. You must be mistaken.

Proceed to Mediterranean Avenue, do not pass Go, and buy it for a penny. 555 will meet you there as he's eager to rent one of your brothels.

[555-04Q2]

I would never rent a Captain's brothel, the LW is not impressed!!! But I would like to rent that pink mini-skirt manufacturing plant you have on First Avenue!

[djarumdudley]

the last word wants non of such poorly brokered deals

[Captain VXR]

it has to take the higher moral stance

[555-04Q2]

Morals? What do you know about morals dear Captain?

[Captain VXR]

That morals work best when they suit me.

[djarumdudley]

the last word no longer suits you or your morals

[Rollo]

The Moral to this story is:

You can't make an Umlaut without breaking a few Pegs.

[555-04Q2]

Yes, you can...

[Captain VXR]

Yes he can
http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/Bob%20the%20Builder%20figure.jpg

[djarumdudley]

yes i can....have the last word

[Rollo]

Could Bob The Builder fix America?

Barack Obama used his theme song as for his election campaign and couldn't.

[555-04Q2]

There is nothing that Bob The Builder cannot do. Fixing America would be completed before his morning cup of coffee was finished. My son says so!!!

[Captain VXR]

I've completed the takeover of the last word.

[555-04Q2]

You dreaming again ol Captain?

[schmenke]

Poor Captain... "A" for effort but ultimately always fails.

[555-04Q2]

Just like the rest of ya :p : BTW, the LW says hello and is really enjoying the sunshine we are having over here today!

[schmenke]

The LW is helping me nurse a nagging cold. Stay away or else I'll sneeze on it.

[Captain VXR]

Your lack of mucus is disturbing.

[schmenke]

Believe me, right now I have a surplus of mucus :s

[Rollo]

Believe me, right now I have a surplus of mucus :s

Have you tried selling your surplus on the common market?

[Captain VXR]

Or the black market, which with the right contacts could earn you lots of money

[555-04Q2]

Don't you mean the "green market" dear Captain?

[schmenke]

Like green snot?

[555-04Q2]

I didn't want to say it...but you seem comfortable doing it!

[schmenke]

Snot no more. The LW is pleased.

[Captain VXR]

with me

[schmenke]

The LW is neither with you or pleased with you. Quite the opposite actually, so you might as well stop trying Captain.

[Captain VXR]

I find your lack of faith disturbing

[555-04Q2]

What the problem is Captain. Not everyone can be a believer!

[Captain VXR]

But everyone can be a belieber

[555-04Q2]

Bieber.....never knew you were such a fan of his music. The LW would NOT be impressed with your choice!

[schmenke]

The Captain a Bieber fan...? That explains a lot :mark: .

[Captain VXR]

Just because everyone can be a belieber doesn't mean Captain VXR has chosen to be a belieber

[555-04Q2]

The LW detects that you are lying about your Bieber status...

[schmenke]

The LW suspects that the Captain is a member of the Justin Bieber fan club.

[555-04Q2]

Forget the LW, I am not impressed!

[schmenke]

...but I am not surprised.

[Captain VXR]

The lw's suspicions are wrong.

[schmenke]

The LW is rarely wrong.

[Captain VXR]

However in this instance, it was

[schmenke]

I don't think so. I'll keep the LW while you attend your weekly Justin Bieber fan club meeting.

[Captain VXR]

first last word of the year.

[Captain VXR]

First lw of the year

[CarlMetro]

Mine too

[schmenke]

Last LW of the year.

[Captain VXR]

For you, yes

[MrJan]

Does this fred still exist?

[Captain VXR]

it seems so

[schmenke]

We might as well close it now that I have the LW.

[Captain VXR]

Sorry, but first you have to make a formal written request to the bureau of locksmiths and wait for them to consider it before this thread can be locked

[schmenke]

I can't be bothered with all that red tape. Why don't you all just bgger off and we can agree amongst ourselves to close it.

[Captain VXR]

It can only be closed during a period in which I have ownership of the lw, according to the bureau of locksmiths

[schmenke]

Well, seeing that you no longer have the LW, the bureau of locksmiths has no jurisdiction.
Consider this thread closed.
Nothing more to see.
Carry on.

[Captain VXR]

The bureau of locksmiths has voided your attempt to lock this thread

[Rollo]

You can't stop the last word. Nobody can stop the last word.

[Captain VXR]

However, the bureau of locksmiths can slow it down to a pace slower than continental drift

[Rollo]

The Bureau of Locksmiths sounds like a scary scary organisation. Have they had any roles in major world events?

[Captain VXR]

Not officially, although many assassinations of those who claimed to be the rightful lw holder have been linked to them :ninja:

[Rollo]

Is that how Franz Ferdinand died then?

[schmenke]

I hear the bureau of locksmiths is a very secretive organisation. Much is discussed behind closed doors that we don't know about.

[Captain VXR]

That you don't know about

[schmenke]

The LW knows all.

[Captain VXR]

As does its rightful owner, me

[djarumdudley]

the last word is NOW rightfully where it belongs

[Captain VXR]

yes, in my possession

[djarumdudley]

try again

[Captain VXR]

ok

[djarumdudley]

not good enough

[Captain VXR]

I think it was

[djarumdudley]

this just shows how informed you are.

[Captain VXR]

I am quite well informed, thank you.

[djarumdudley]

but still without the last word

[schmenke]

Give it up you two.
The LW is, and will continue to be, with me. Permanently.
Thread closed.

[djarumdudley]

nice try, hotshot!

[Captain VXR]

Boys, play time is over

[djarumdudley]

the only thing over is your time with the last word.

[Captain VXR]

I disagree

[schmenke]

Bickering is pointless.
In a gesture of good will, I’ll agree to share the LW. I’ll hang on to it 99% of the time, and you all can share the remaining 1%. Fair ‘nuff methinks.

[Captain VXR]

Methinks your projections of lw ownership are greatly flawed

[djarumdudley]

especially when i've agreed to nothing

[Captain VXR]

nor have I, in fact as self appointed benign overlord of the LW thread, I proclaim myself rightful owner of the LW

[djarumdudley]

your consistent display of failed ownership is astounding

[Captain VXR]

your consistent display of hypocrisy is astounding

[djarumdudley]

and that's why the last word loves me

[Captain VXR]

...because its a religious fundie?

[djarumdudley]

perhaps, if that's how you choose to see it. I simply choose to see it as mine.

[Captain VXR]

Then you are hallucinating

[djarumdudley]

there's no hallucinating about me having the last word

[Captain VXR]

there's no hallucinating about me having the last word

you've realised that I hold it then?

[schmenke]

You two have obviously been consuming some questionable fungi as it is quite clear that the LW is with me.

[djarumdudley]

yet again the amount of wrongness from you is impeccable.

[schmenke]

C'mon Dudley, that's enough with the 'shrooms.
Time to return to reality to see that the LW is, and has always been, with me.

[djarumdudley]

apparently your under the effects of hallucinogens much more than myself

[schmenke]

Nope, sound as pound I am, as is the LW.
May I suggest, Dudley, that perhaps you entertain some professional help...? :erm:

[djarumdudley]

no, i'd rather continue entertaining the last word.

[schmenke]

I think the LW is tiring of your antics and needs to distance itself.
It feels far more comfortable here with me.

[djarumdudley]

once again the last word shies away from your supposed comfort

[Captain VXR]

Boys, please, put the acid tabs back in daddy's 'medicine' cabinet. Now run along and pass me the lw and and an ice cold bottle of Zywiec.

[djarumdudley]

you can have the zywiec, i'll keep the last word.

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[schmenke]

The LW dislikes zywiec and is quite frankly disturbed by the recent suggestions of questionable consumables. It has retreated to the sanity of my companionship.

[djarumdudley]

seems the last word has issues with your supposed sanity

[Captain VXR]

I just checked, and indeed it does

[djarumdudley]

thanks for keeping the last word warm for me.

[Captain VXR]

and thanks for looking after it whilst I was busy

[djarumdudley]

well i wasn't quite done yet

[schmenke]

Sorry do you need a few more minutes to wipe up?

[djarumdudley]

the last word is not amused by your crudeness

[schmenke]

The LW is not amused by your activities.

[djarumdudley]

but yet it has no problem remaining with me

[schmenke]

Only out of sympathy, temporarily.
To maintain its sanity it has returned to me.

[djarumdudley]

the last word has no need for the type of sanity you're selling

[Captain VXR]

it has all the time in the world for me :D

[djarumdudley]

apparently that time was short

[schmenke]

The grows tired of continuous relocation. As such, it has claimed permanent residency with me.

[djarumdudley]

your post is mysterious as you refer to something residing with you, but don't specify. i, though, have the last word.

[schmenke]

The LW is mysterious and often disguises itself in an attempt to avoid you lot. The LW, however, stays in continuous contact with me, never straying far from my presence, and always returning.

[djarumdudley]

but yet inevitably the last word gets tired of your presence and has no choice but to rid itself of you.

[Captain VXR]

mine.

[djarumdudley]

not anymore

[schmenke]

Indeed.

[djarumdudley]

as i had previously stated

[schmenke]

You can keep trying but all attempts will be futile.

[djarumdudley]

once again you are incorrect

[schmenke]

I don't think so. Hang on, I'll ask the LW.

[djarumdudley]

the last woed has no time nor interest in your questions

[schmenke]

Neither myself or the LW care about the last woed.

[djarumdudley]

i prefer the company of the last word as opposed to the last woed as well.

[schmenke]

i prefer the company of the last woed.

Well, okaay...

[djarumdudley]

...for me to have the last word again

[schmenke]

Briefly...

[djarumdudley]

and ever less so for you

[Captain VXR]

I claim full ownership of the LW. Resistance is useless.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-7Rdjj951yiA/TaOhqwtdA4I/AAAAAAAAAG8/_BGEkB-bSt8/s1600/Vogon.jpg

[djarumdudley]

the last words resistance of you is apparent

[Captain VXR]

did you sign the consent to own the last word forms?

[schmenke]

Resistance is defined by Ohm's Law; the ratio of Voltage to current.

This lesson in basic electrical circuitry is sponsored by the LW :)

[djarumdudley]

your continued attempts at holding the last word remain futile

[schmenke]

Au contraire...

[djarumdudley]

....au contraire, indeed...

[schmenke]

The LW is a bit knackered after a busy weekend so please keep the noise down.

[djarumdudley]

yes, it had a busy weekend with me and now it's back.

[schmenke]

...with me.

[Captain VXR]

I want some of what you've been smoking If you think its yours

[djarumdudley]

you can have the dry goods, i'll have the last word again

[Captain VXR]

I'll have both ta.

[djarumdudley]

again you misunderstand how this works

[Captain VXR]

I think I understand it just fine.

[djarumdudley]

seems you don't

[schmenke]

This doesn't have to be complicated. Just leave the LW with me and problem solved.

[djarumdudley]

it's not that simple

[Captain VXR]

You're wrong. Mine.

[djarumdudley]

it's amazing how consistently wrong you are

[Mp3 Astra]

Almost forgot to take the Last Word while I was here. Yoink.

[Captain VXR]

They took our last word

[djarumdudley]

as much as i appreciate your South Park reference, i appreciate having the last word more

[schmenke]

MP3 Astra's sporadic presence here disqualifies his claim to the LW.
In fact, the only legitimate claim is mine.

[djarumdudley]

until now!

[Captain VXR]

Screw the rules, its mine

[djarumdudley]

it's amazing how much you just don't get it.

[schmenke]

Includng the LW.

[djarumdudley]

no, i do get it.

[Captain VXR]

Nurse, nurse, djarumdudley's out of his bed again

[djarumdudley]

and with the last word

[schmenke]

The LW, thankfully, has escaped and is safely with me.

[djarumdudley]

the last woord was not impressed with your safety

[Captain VXR]

my safety is better
http://www.army.mod.uk/images/image-scroller/shotgun_1.jpg

[djarumdudley]

the last word has been rescued from the Captain's militant tactics

[Captain VXR]

However my freedom fighters have gained it back for the most gloriously holy Captain of them all

[djarumdudley]

the last word was quite amused at the spectacularly bungling abilities of said freedom fighters

[Captain VXR]

said freedom fighters have been replaced with a stupendous legion of daleks which have recaptured the lw.

[djarumdudley]

the daleks have since been overrun by a force of ridiculously sluggish moving Space Invaders return the last word to it's proper place

[Captain VXR]

However a giant chicken beat them all up and returned the last word to me

[djarumdudley]

fortuanately for the last word a fat man with glasses performed an ambush with a sack of mallets to return the last word to me

[Captain VXR]

trolololololololol

[djarumdudley]

the last word is not amused by your mocking of it with your complete usage of non words

[Captain VXR]

however it is still mine

[djarumdudley]

yet again you are proven wrong

[Captain VXR]

yet again you are guilty of compulsive lying

[djarumdudley]

but yet again i have the last word

[Captain VXR]

ha.

[djarumdudley]

truly indeed ha

[Captain VXR]

ha ha.

[schmenke]

Ah, the intellectual discussions around here never cease to amaze me...

[Captain VXR]

You stink like poo.

[djarumdudley]

and pee

[schmenke]

Well this thread has gone down the toilet...

[djarumdudley]

...and the flush has returned the last word to me

[Captain VXR]

mine.

[djarumdudley]

and returned

[schmenke]

Flushed again...

[djarumdudley]

the sewage treatment plant always returns me a pristine last word

[schmenke]

...and a stray turd or two, which is why the LW promptly returns to me.

[djarumdudley]

but it never likes to stay with you

[schmenke]

More often than with you.

[djarumdudley]

as usual, incorrect

[Captain VXR]

Its favourite owner is me, naturally.

[djarumdudley]

then how come it insists on coming back to me?

[schmenke]

Just for the occasional laugh. It then promptly returns to me.

[djarumdudley]

only to return to me

[Captain VXR]

Its basically an open relationship, it's with me most of the time but sometimes spends short periods with others.

[djarumdudley]

well your time gets shorter on every further visit

[Captain VXR]

I wouldn't be so sure.