FGP 2014

[N. Jones]

I think people are waiting for testing to be over. There seem to be a lot of problems with most teams. Also, I don't think very many people are willing to hitch themselves to Mercedes and/or LotusF1 yet.

[N. Jones]

So we now have 17 entries in total? Really?

Instead of talking about rooms for rent, can we actually talk about the issue here? Why so few this year?

Is it just the FGP that's not popular anymore or is the forums in general? This place seems much more quiet than it was 5 years ago...

Check that. 20 teams now. https://sites.google.com/site/2009fgp/teams

[Tazio]

(Reuters) Slash LLC press release:

The big man himself told a group of reporters that he is very pleased with the performance of the team in winter testing.

"It is clear that I had unique insight into the workings at Grove with the Williams challengers."

The German continued

"Let's just say a little bird gave me inside information."

He stopped short of revealing his source, and the existence of a romantic affair with Susie Wolf who apparently liked to talk....A LOT (but not too loudly) in the throes of passion.
Mr. Slash, as he likes to be called went on to express guarded optimism about his drivers:

"Red Bull will eventually be there or there about with Danny collecting good points for the team. I don't think I need to go into detail about Nico, It is well understood around the paddock that he is the 2nd fastest driver in the field, and the fastest German.
I can also count on the Mercedes works team to carry their rather substantial weight.
I also believe that McLaren will disappoint its owners"

Finally Mr. Slash ended his interview with a rather cryptic message:

"If any Johnny-come-lately tries to copy my freakin' team I am going to take you for champagne out of tall glasses."
Then expect sangria through a needle"

Team Owner Driver#1 Driver#2 Reserve Chassis Engine Bonus GP
Happy Bubble Racing Team jens Ricciardo Bottas Morbidelli Mercedes McLaren-Mercedes Canada
L A K K A pantealex Ricciardo Kobayashi Petrov Ferrari Ferrari Brazil
Slash LLC. Tazio Hulkenberg Ricciardo De Silvestro Mercedes Williams-Mercedes India
Team Loco Americano F1 airshifter Perez Maldonado de la Rosa Ferrari LotusF1-Renault USA
RedStar Team N. Jones Jr Raikkonen Chilton de la Rosa Marussia Ferrari Canada
Ford Focus F1 Team sponspored by Dominos rjbetty Magnussen Bottas Frijns Mercedes McLaren-Mercedes Monaco
Force Finland COD Ricciardo Bottas Kovalainen McLaren Mercedes Monaco
OxyClean POSF1 Sponsored by Lionel N. Jones Sr. Gutierrez Maldonado Pic Ferrari Ferrari Italy
Force Yorkshire Wasted Talent Ricciardo Bottas van der Garde McLaren Mercedes Monaco
Red Passion Team pino Ricciardo Magnussen Pic McLaren Ferrari Italy
Team Marlboro Koz Racing Koz Ricciardo Magnussen Villeneuve McLaren McLaren-Mercedes Belgium
Team Mia Witt & Tom Horn Mia 01 Raikkonen Maldonado Berggren Sauber Sauber-Ferrari Belgium
HennersF1 Racing henners88 Ricciardo Magnussen Vandoorne Force India Mercedes China
Aki's Hedgehog Racing Team steveaki13 Ricciardo Maldonado Kovalainen Mercedes McLaren-Mercedes Canada
warumnicht rensport scaliwag-2 Button Magnussen Vandoorne McLaren McLaren-Mercedes Canada
Hamilton Abbey call_me_andrew Hamilton Bianchi Leimer Williams McLaren-Mercedes China
ANFIELD's ASSASSINS anfield5 Hulkenberg gutierrez Kovalainen Ferrari Force India-Mercedes Belgium
Sinclair Single F1 Nick-aki13 Magnussen Maldonado Kovalainen Red Bull McLaren-Mercedes Singapore
Minardi Minardi Magnussen Maldonado Pic Mercedes McLaren-Mercedes Australia
Team 137 SkyTom Ricciardo Bottas Liuzzi McLaren Mercedes Belgium
KATZ Racing Nikki Katz Rosberg Kyvat da Costa McLaren Williams-Mercedes Italy

[jens]

Aki's Hedgehog Racing Team would like to announce an impending deal with the Happy Bubble Racing Team. After the Ford Focus F1 Team turned down the offer of parties, AHRT (Aki's Hedgehog Racing Team) would like to invite Happy Bubbles Racing Teams boss Jens to an initial party to discuss a deal.

In return for Happy Bubble Racing's Computer programmes we can offer exclusive use of our Wind Tunnel here at our Chelmsford Base in the UK.

Below are regulations for any use of said wind tunnel.

-Any team using our wind tunnel must promise to turn the lights off after use.
-Sadly the source of our wind tunnel as a single desk top fan, thus power is an issue. However AHRT's team boss steveaki13 has offered a weeks supply of Baked Beans and Brussel Sprouts to aid power.

We hope Happy Bubble Racing Teams boss Jens will contact us soon if he cares to push forward our partnership.

Happy Bubble Racing TeamTM wants to apologise for the delay and wants to inform that Mr Jens is not the team principal of the team since last year. He is actually in a new role there - the official cleaner.

However, Happy Bubble Racing Team has appointed Mr Jens as the interim PR and communications manager before getting new one, so he has now got the rights to answer the request.

Jens feels very welcome about being invited to the party to discuss the wind tunnel usage. Without a better deal currently in sight, we are seriously considering the option of renting the desk top fan. We propose using a trial day for the desk top fan to find out, how it functions, because Mr Jens and certainly not the chief car designer Vyatcheslav Zaitsev have never seen a wind tunnel, so we are interested in finding out, how does air flow actually influence the car. Power is not really here the issue, because with slower air flow we can actually analyze the air flow better! If air flow is too strong, we are afraid we do not have the tools and experience to really understand, what is going on.

If asked, how did we design the car if we do not understand or know about air flow (or at least didn't understand do far), the answer is that we roughly designed a racing car, which about looks similar to the rest of the field. "Copy from the best and you'll be right up there with them too," was the motto of the design team. However, with access to wind tunnel we can stop copying and now really work out our own ideas to implement on the car!

[aryan]

Here's my Entry N. Jones:

Team: NSA Team Mt. Damavand F1 Racing
Engine: Mercedes
Chassis: Mercedes
Driver 1: Bottas
Driver 2: Ericsson
Driver 3: da Costa
Bonus GP: Melbourne

Our title sponsor this year is the US National Security Agency (NSA). They are trying to re-brand their image and become a bit more friendly to citizens world over. Of course with them as the title sponsor, you guys can rest assured that we already have access to all of your drawings and designs and wind tunnel data!

We had to turn down an offer from Vladimir Putin for the title sponsorship, which wanted to use this opportunity to broadcast a message of peace and love to the world! Of course now that he has lost this sponsorship race, he might just invade Ukraine to prop up his ego again!

[Extremerevs]

As much fun as it was eating crow for an hour while I listened to Firstgear bragging about his free lunch and beating my FGP team last year... I; like the best F1 team ever; will never loose hope!
Down with all of the turncoats and fair weather fans... Who ever said loyalty is dead?

Team Name:
" McLaren Forever"
Chassis: McLaren (of course)
Engine: Mercedes (of course)
Driver #1: Kevin Magnussen (of course)
Driver #2: Pastor Maldonado (Would have been Button if I had the cash)
Driver #3: Stoffel Vandoorne (of course)
Bonus GP: Russia
Team sponsor: Sam Adams Boston Lager...the best way to dull the pain of braggarts.

[Extremerevs]

Hold the phone!!!
I didn't catch the 'chassis engine combo'!!!!
There is balance in the force once again...Yippy

Team Name:
'McLaren Forever'
Chassis: McLaren 14 Mil
Engine: McLaren-Mercedes 11 Mil
Driver #1: Jensen Button 14 Mil
Driver #2: Kevin Magnussen 8 Mil
Driver #3: Stoffel Vandoorne 1 Mil
Total = 48 Mil
Bonus GP: Russia
Team sponsor: Tanqueray Gin... great when enjoyed with your lady friend!!!
Loyalty restored...

[N. Jones]

You and scaliwag-2 have the same team except for bonus gp.

Good Luck!

[Tazio]

Hold the phone!!!
I didn't catch the 'chassis engine combo'!!!!
There is balance in the force once again...Yippy

Team Name:
'McLaren Forever'
Chassis: McLaren 14 Mil
Engine: McLaren-Mercedes 11 Mil
Driver #1: Jensen Button 14 Mil
Driver #2: Kevin Magnussen 8 Mil
Driver #3: Stoffel Vandoorne 1 Mil
Total = 48 Mil
Bonus GP: Russia
Team sponsor: Tanqueray Gin... great when enjoyed with your lady friend!!!
Loyalty restored...

You will lose to Firstgear again

[Extremerevs]

What was I saying about fair weather fans... Firstgear and Ferrari, then Renault...what will it be this year? I know, him paying for lunch!

Scaliwag-2, you my friend have great taste!